Outside the Box: Double Kit nerds, Covid, and clerical errors

Luton Town’s Sonny Bradley (Liam Smith)

Another week, another excuse to use a photo by my good friend Liam Smith of my beloved Luton Town! There’s actually a reason for this one though.

Luton played Man Utd in the Carabao Cup on Tuesday. Well, Luton reserves played United reserves in time-honored League Cup tradition. With a tight game in the first half, 3rd Degree and The Kickaround’s Peter Welpton made the great observation that Luton’s Sonny Bradley’s “impressive collection of tattoos make him look like his head is popping out from the hedgerow.”

Aside from having more tattoos than hot meals, the Hatters’ captain had a hopelessly brilliant yet funny moment in a 2-1 win over Wayne Rooney’s Derby County last weekend. In the final seconds of the game, Derby’s Andre Wisdom has his shot blocked by Bradley on the floor.

I’m not going to pretend this is a diving header but, like Phil Jones in 2016, it’s funny to see any player fall over and then lunge at the ball hoping for the best.

The Greatest To Evra Play

Patrice Evra has arguably been more entertaining since retiring from football, with his social media posts that show a guy loving life and not really caring what people think. That’s great for social media, less so for broadcasting as Sky Sports found out last week.

Evra served as an analyst for Manchester United’s loss to Crystal Palace, and talked about Wilfried Zaha’s two-game spell at Manchester United when the reds bought Zaha for Β£10m before selling him back to Palace for only Β£3m two years later.

There was a lot of talk at the time about a relationship with then-United boss David Moyes’ daughter. Enter Evra with the confirmation.

Then Sky has to issue a full apology claiming that the pair never even met.

If the reminder was bad enough for Moyes, his West Ham side lost to Arsenal and then he came down with Covid-19.

When it rains, it pours.

Covid Chaos

Speaking of this year’s most used term, Asian Champions League winners Al-Hilal of Saudi Arabia have had 15 players and six members of staff come down with the virus.

At the weekend they held Shahr Khodrou to a goalless draw with a bare eleven and two substitute keepers signed through emergency dispensation.

Two further players were diagnosed on Monday leaving Al-Hilal to name a nine-man starting line up with the two substitute keepers for Wednesday’s game against Shabab Al-Ahli (of Mauro Diaz fame).

Al-Hilal had already advanced from the group stage, however, the Asian confederation stepped in and kicked the champions from the competition for having fewer than 13 fit players.

And in more Covid’ness, USL-C side Loudoun United just canceled the remaineder of their season due to Covid-19.

Roma’s Roster Wasn’t Built In a Day

…or at all apparently. 3rd Degree contributor Alex Aarant is a Roma fan and found this story the hard way.

Roma thought they’d earned a point against Hellas Verona on the opening day of the Serie A season only to find out that an administrative error had caused them to forfeit the game.

Serie A’s roster rules require 25 players to be registered, although players 22 and under are exempt from registration. Midfielder Amadou Diawara turned 23 in the summer but was never registered to play after aging out of his exemption. He played 89 minutes.

In a typically Italian twist, the man whose mistake gave Hellas Verona a free 3-0 win, Pantaleo Longo, resigned and is reportedly close to joining Verona.

Absolute Animals

Moving on to a game that finished with the right result; English, non-league club Ilkley Town experienced an interesting break in play as an alpaca ran across the pitch.

That’s better than a water break!

Even training isn’t exempt as the Brazilian women’s national team found out after parrot landed on the head of former Houston Dash defender, Bruna Benites.

Kit Nerding Pt.1

The Netherlands is famous for windmills, clogs, and beautiful football… but it’s really known for laws relating to the public consumption of cannabis, and legal sex trades.

FC Emmen signed a sponsorship deal with EasyToys who make…uhh…”adult” toys. The Dutch authorities pulled the plug on the close-to $600,000 per season deal claiming β€œit contradicts good taste and common decency”. Oddly, Emmen’s local rivals FC Groningen have been sponsored by EasyToys’ parent company with no such issue for several years.

While the shirts can’t be worn in Eredivisie, they will still be available for fans to purchase. Given the popularity – or lack there – of AdvoCare as FC Dallas sponsor, I dare say that most FCD fans would rather EasyToys than the mid-level marketing brand. I’d also rank that higher than the nine Premier League and six La Liga teams who are sponsored by betting companies.

Kit Nerding Pt.2

A few weeks ago Wolves fan Alan Cox recently raised a few chuckles by pointing out that the team’s new away shirt looked like his wife’s flowery dress.

In a somewhat brilliant move to engage fans (take note FC Dallas), garner some good publicity (take note FC Dallas), and control the narrative (take note FC Dallas), the club’s GM of Commercial Operations sent Cox the actual shirt with a witty letter.

Mings Stings Konsa

A couple of miles across the West Midlands, Ezri Konsa scored his second goal for Aston Villa as they beat Sheffield United, but the shot taking a slight deflection off Tyrone Mings brought back a panic from January when Konsa thought he’d headed in his first Premier League goal.

Konsa did get credited with the goal this time but Mings still brought the last time up.

What’s On

Isn’t it wonderful to have a full schedule from Europe, as well as North and South America!

Let’s be honest, the best things going are chances to see Reggie Cannon (Boavista) and Weston McKennie (Juventus) continue their development, while also having a chance to watch their former club on local TV and a bunch of streaming platforms if you’re not going to Toyota Stadium on Sunday.

Saturday, September 26:
6:30am – Brighton v Manchester Utd (EPL) – NBCSN
8:30am – Bayer Leverkusen v RB Leipzig (Bundesliga) – ESPN+
11:30am – West Brom v Chelsea (EPL) – NBC
1:45pm – Inter Milan v Fiorentina (Serie A) – ESPN+
3:00pm – Boavista v Porto (Liga NOS) – Nothin’ legal!
9:00pm – Monterrey v Tigres UANL (Liga MX) – FS1

Sunday, September 27:
6:00am – Sheffield United v Leeds Utd (EPL) – NBCSN
8:00am – Tottenham v Newcastle Utd (EPL) – NBCSN
10:30am – Man City v Leicester City (EPL) – NBCSN
1:45pm – Roma v Juventus (Serie A) – ESPN+
7:30pm – FC Dallas v Orlando City (MLS) – FSSW / FCDallas.com/stream
9:30pm – LA Galaxy v Seattle Sounders (MLS) – ESPN+

Monday, September 28:
12:00pm – Fulham v Aston Villa (EPL) – Peacock
1:45pm – Bologna v Parma (Serie A) – ESPN+
2:15pm – Liverpool v Arsenal (EPL) – Peacock
6:00pm – FC Juarez v Toluca (Liga MX Femenil) – TUDN

Tuesday, September 29:
5:15pm – Gremio v Universidad Catolica (Copa Libertadores) – beIN SPORTS
7:30pm – Boca Juniors v Libertad (Copa Libertadores) – beIN SPORTS

Wednesday, September 30:
11:00am – Benevento v Inter Milan (Serie A) – ESPN+
1:30pm – Bayern Munich v Borussia Dortmund (Bundesliga) – ESPN+
2:30pm – Real Madrid v Real Valladolid (La Liga) – beIN SPORTS
6:00pm – North Carolina FC v Charlotte Independence (USL-C) – ESPN+
7:00pm – FC Tulsa v OKC Energy (USL-C) – ESPN+
7:30pm – River Plate v Sao Paulo (Copa Libertadores) – beIN SPORTS Connect

Thursday, October 1:
2:30pm – Celta Vigo v Barcelona (La Liga) – beIN SPORTS

Friday, October 2:
12:00pm – Coventry City v Bournemouth (EFL-C) – ESPN+
1:00pm – Moreirense v Boavista (Liga NOS) – Nothin’ legal!
2:00pm – PSG v Angers SCO (Ligue 1) – beIN SPORTS

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