This is really the play-in round, but MLS calls it the “Wild Card” round, so sure, I’ll call it that. If the NCAA and their band of lawyers, who can only really enforce trademarks and screw college kids, didn’t exist, we could call it the “First Four,” but alas.

Thanks to Carlos Ruiz’s only 2016 goal in his only 2016 action for FCD the previous week against Seattle, FCD went into the final game of the season needing only not to lose and for the Rapids not to win in order to capture the Supporters Shield.

By the way, I do plan on visiting La Mestalla while I’m here in Valencia and if you don’t mind, Nico, I’m gonna drop your name frequently as a close personal friend.

Friends, you have no idea how hard I struggled to not make this game the Sickos Game of the Week.

What am I talking about? What I am talking about is something like what the Burn did in 2003 when they, in the midst of one of the worst seasons in the history of Major League Soccer, panicked…

On August 1, a press release emanated from Major League Soccer, announcing that New England Revolution Head Coach, Sporting Director, and Official Smartest Guy in the Room Bruce Arena had been placed on administrative leave for “inappropriate and insensitive remarks” and that the matter was under investigation.

People can care about whatever they want to care about, and I’m not here to tell you that you shouldn’t. But at some point, that goes both ways. We don’t care about Copa Tejas, Austin, and you can’t make us.

I’ll be honest with y’all: I thought that Leagues Cup was a big pile of bullshit when it was announced, all the way until it actually started.

Say, wasn’t SKC in this slot last week? Yes, they were. If they keep this up, they might get named an honorary Little Brother.