Outside the Box: FCD is back and de Jong gets stung

As we look forward to FC Dallas’ glorious return tonight, we’re given constant reminders of the danger of the COVID-19 virus and the responsibility that falls on everyone.

Taylor Twellman made an idiot of himself by asking if a video of players eating Cheez-Its was the reason that 10 FC Dallas players tested positive for the virus, such is the scrutiny placed on the players to keep infection out of their numbers.

Scotland has seen three games postponed for different incidents. Aberdeen had eight players visit a bar that became the center of a spike in cases in the city, with two of the players testing positive.

Boli Bolingoli has drawn the wrath of not only Celtic manager Neil Lennon, but also Scotland’s First Minister Nicola Sturgeon, after secretly making a short trip to Spain, going against not only the team but league rules.

The Scottish authorities have hinted that one more slip-up could see the Scottish season canceled just three games into the season.

Bantair

Speaking of flights you’ll regret, Ryanair is the Irish equivalent of Spirit. You pay for baggage, a fee to check in, a fee if you use a debit card, and all that fun stuff. They famously tried to charge people £1 to use the toilet on flights.

Anyhow, that’s enough of Dan’s worst airline experiences. The Irish carrier responded to a Tweet showing St. James’ Park from one of their flights by poking some fun at $50m flop Joelinton.

In case you’re wondering, the social media person at Ryanair was a little bit off with their math.

The one-way $19.26 flight from Newcastle upon Tyne to Palma in the Spanish island of Mallorca could actually be made by each of the 268,064 inhabitants ten times and still have $525,000 left over to pay for one person’s carry-on for three of those trips.

Bee Is For Barca

Barcelona midfielder Frenkie de Jong had his left hand bandaged for the Blaugrana’s Champions League win over Napoli last week. Was he trying to match team mate Luis Suarez and his lucky hand wrap from his Liverpool days?

No, he was stung by a bee!

You can make your own jokes about things swelling.

You Love To See It

Elsewhere in the Champions League, Man City knocked out Real Madrid.

Pep Guardiola and Zinedine Zidane are icons of the midfield for Barcelona and Real, but their time on the field and in the dugout never overlapped in the Clasico.

This season marked the first time the two had met in competition since 2002 with City taking both legs 2-1.

A journalist captured a few moments shared between two legendary players who successfully made the transition to management. You just love to see it!

This Week In Weird

Liga MX can be a strange place and Xolos made that abundantly clear by rolling out a medical cart with the Millennium Falcon sitting on top of it. I hope security are made to dress up like Storm Troopers next.

MLS is Actually Back

It’s finally here, FC Dallas leads off the return of MLS after that preseason tournament that Portland won.

The MLS is Back Tournament didn’t win many plaudits but it broke a Guinness World Record for largest single-location professional soccer tournament.

That’s very specific, like saying I’m the oldest writer of any male named Dan in my household. Screw it, I’m applying for that as a record.

Anyway, let’s get ready for real soccer coming back by looking forward to last season’s bromance reuniting as Dom Badji returns with Nashville SC.

What’s On

Two FC Dallas games, that’s what! Two chances to see North Texas SC. The rest of the Champions League Quarter-Finals, after PSG’s dramatic comeback win in today’s first quarter-final. Plus the semi-finals, and Europa League semis too.

Wednesday, August 12:
7:30pm – FC Dallas v Nashville SC (MLS) – TXA21 / ESPN+ (Out of market)

Thursday, August 13:
2:00pm – RB Leipzig v Atletico Madrid (Champions League) – TUDN / UniMas / CBS All Access
9:00pm – America v Santos Laguna (Liga MX) – TUDN

Friday, August 14:
2:00pm – Barcelona v Bayern Munich (Champions League) – TUDN / Univision / CBS All Access
6:00pm – Orlando City B v Fort Lauderdale CF (USL-1) – ESPN+
7:00pm – Forward Madison v Tormenta FC (USL-1) – ESPN+
9:30pm – Puebla v Pachuca (Liga MX) – TUDN

Saturday, August 15:
2:00pm – Manchester City v Lyon (Champions League) – TUDN / UniMas / CBS All Access
4:00pm – Colorado Springs Switchbacks v New Mexico Utd (USL-C) – ESPN+
8:00pm – North Texas SC v New England Revolution II (USL-1) – ESPN+

Sunday, August 16:
2:00pm – Sevilla v Manchester United (Europa League) – TUDN / CBS All Access
7:30pm – FC Dallas v Nashville SC (MLS) – TXA21 / ESPN+ (out of market)

Monday, August 17:
2:00pm – Inter v Shakhtar Donetsk (Europa League) – CBS All Access
9:00pm – Leon v Xolos (Liga MX) – TUDN

Tuesday, August 18:
2:00pm – Man City/Lyon v Barca/Bayern (UCL SF) – TUDN / Univision / CBS All Access

Wednesday, August 19:
2:00pm – RBL/Atleti v PSG (UCL SF) – TUDN / Univision / CBS All Access
7:00pm – Fort Lauderdale CF v North Texas SC (USL-1) – ESPN+
8:00pm – San Antonio FC v OKC Energy (USL-C) – ESPN+
9:00pm – Real Monarchs v New Mexico United (USL-C) – ESPN+

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